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A Couple of Links About #yesGayYA

Followups to the links I posted last week:

A direct one: What's going on with #yesGayYA
" ... before I can get to a number of other things, we have a publishing kerfuffle to discuss. Yes, another one. It's gotten pretty bad ... The long version: (Pack a lunch, you'll need it) ..."
[Excellent summary, with plenty of links , of the whole situation.]

A related one: Of Bigotry, Children and Culture:
"At four different points [in the show], the comedian asked for child volunteers to come up onto the stage and have themselves drawn ... The fourth and final time her hand went ignored, the girl in front of us let out a frustrated sigh and exclaimed, ‘He’s only choosing boys ... !’"
[About children, and the lessons that we may not know we're teaching]

This entry is also posted at Dreamwidth. Comment at either location, as you prefer.


( 13 comments — Leave a comment )
(Deleted comment)
Sep. 17th, 2011 09:17 pm (UTC)

But that's exactly the point that the blogger was making - the comedian probably didn't know that's what he was doing. Yet he was teaching the little girl that boys were more likely to get things by asking than girls are (among other lessons). People don't necessarily think about the influence that their choices in toys and so on for the kids have on the kids, either.

I used to use my Barbie dolls like action figures. I wanted more male ones, but no one ever thought to buy me a GI Joe. I bought my daughter one when she wanted one - besides, he had cool things like a rubber raft that was the right size for the Barbies too.

My father wasn't thinking about treating us as he would sons (we didn't have any brothers), but he actually manned up pretty well when it became clear that's what I wanted (not about sports, though - I hated sports). When I was about 8, he got a new type of saw for his home workshop and he asked me what toy he should make for me. I said I wanted a saw. He though I said "sword" (a consequence of his own slight New York accent). When I saw that what he was cutting out wasn't the right shape, I said "No! A saw - like yours!" So he cut a toy one out of wood ... and the next weekend, we went to the hardware store, and I got my very own little keyhole saw and a real tack hammer, and he gave me nails and scraps of wood, and later a low-voltage transformer and some wire and tiny lights, and let me wire my dollhouse with electric lights. But what about girls who didn't have that kind of a father?

(Deleted comment)
Sep. 18th, 2011 03:23 pm (UTC)
I had a dozen girl dolls (not all of them were Barbies) and a male doll. That meant that, in my stories, it was always the man in the role of a damel in distress and the girls who were placed as the villain, the hero, the sidekick and the guards. It was just a matter of demographics. It was okay by me, because I felt identified with the hero anyway. I would have liked more male dolls, though.

I was lucky enough to have a big brother. I could borrow his cars when I got tired of the dolls.

Trying to explain/show a child that a toy/garment/book/whatever is not for them because of their gender is incredibly wrong, because children tend to believe their parents.

Those were interesting links. Thanks for sharing.
Sep. 17th, 2011 09:19 pm (UTC)

"Bar Mitzvah," usually. (Eee! Another Jewish Saiyuki fan!)

(Deleted comment)
Sep. 17th, 2011 10:35 pm (UTC)

Awww, c'mon, leave me my illusions!


I'm Jewish both by birth and preference. I post about it from time to time ... the High Holy Days are coming up, so you'll probably see something about it in the next couple of weeks.

Whether I'm certain of God's existence is another thing entirely. (And my husband is not Jewish.)

(Deleted comment)
Sep. 18th, 2011 03:28 pm (UTC)
Maybe it's a situation that feeds itself? Maybe girls get more upset because they're taught that girls have to be pretty, girls are pretty, girls' appearance is important, girls should look charming, girls should act like a lasy, girls are pretty... so they get angry when someone portrait them as not-pretty? Maybe it's the kind of praise they've been taught to expect, and they get upset when they don't receive it.

I remember being moderately vain when I was a child, too. But I wonder if it was in my nature or it was ingrained in me.
(Deleted comment)
Sep. 20th, 2011 10:29 pm (UTC)
Yes, that makes sense. Not everything is genetics and not everything is environment, a mix of both might be the key.
Sep. 19th, 2011 01:38 am (UTC)
Yeah, that's what I was wondering too.
Sep. 19th, 2011 01:38 am (UTC)
That blog post is fantastic.
( 13 comments — Leave a comment )


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